The Purple Throbber

Professor Xanax stepped out into the sun, over the bodies of the slumbering security force as he and his goons exited the bank, their duffels stuffed with cash. The plan had proceeded smoothly. Like any summer Sunday morning at 5AM, the city was deserted. The bank vaults combination and security protocols extracted from the former teller were spot on. His supply of sleep gas was ready. The perfect canvas for a Xanax crime masterpiece. 

Loading their overstuffed duffels into their van, they felt it. A vibration. Low, steady, building. Xanax froze.

“No, it can’t be. He couldn’t know!” 

One of the goons — suddenly sick to his stomach–turned to another and asked “What is that? Everything’s shakin’!”

His pal, now bent over, face screwed up in pain managed to respond..”It’s that… humming guy…..destroys stuff…with…vibrations” and hit the ground, unconscious. The humming grew more devastating -mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Defiant to the last, Professor Xanax, legs like jello, head throbbing, managed to get out in the open, away from the van, as its tires split with successive BANG-BANGBANGBANG!

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Xanax raised his fists high in the air, shaking them at the rooftops, screaming at his unseen foe.

“I know you’re there, you humming freak! One of… one.. of…these days… I’ll….. I’ll*”  and unable to continue, the spasming villain collapsed onto the pavement.

With the perpetrators down for the count, the vibrations stopped. The coast clear, the police rounded the corner, lights flashing. As they mopped up the scene, the captain picked up his communicator and flicked it on “I think we’ve got things in hand here, um… Purple Throbber, thanks again.”

The communicator crackled back: “My pleasure captain. Guess the professor’s information on the silent alarms weren’t all up to date. Take care now.”

The captain looked up at a nearby rooftop and saw only a flash of purple as the hero disappeared once again. 

One of his officers stepped up. “I guess he did it again, saved the day, huh Cap?” 

“I guess he did,” the captain said as he turned back toward the clean up “but really, he’s got to think about changing that name.”